It's really not all it's cracked up to be. You see, Marissa and I joined the club together this year. We spent some time in the morning and early afternoon hunting for parking spaces, finding bargains, waiting in lines, and spending money. Not much on any of those (apparently club membership was down this year). We even paused for a bite of lunch at the local Old Fashioned Hamburgers place, where I dined on a chicken salad and 64 ounces of the Good Doctor. Marissa had a burger and Aidan had his requisite chicken nuggets. The early phase of membership was successful and we returned home. However, I still had some shopping to do on my own.
I left my companions to their naps and reentered the fray. But the Good Doctor turned out to be the villain in this story because 64 ounces of caffeine-soaked sugar in a short period of time produced two effects in my body: lots of uberhyper running around and lots of...well...runs. I was a bit uncomfortable in the stores I visited; many of them didn't have restrooms and I hadn't yet found exactly what I was looking for.
Several hours (and a multitude of unnecessary details that shall not be mentioned) later, I returned home successful and exhausted. And in serious need of electrolytes.
I don't think I'll be paying my dues to this club for quite some time. The induction rituals just aren't worth it!